i slack, and lurk you, and think about what it would be like if you were still around. nothing will make this happen but you and i should stop thinking about all the potential because there is none. i'm over feeling so worthless. i'm sick of feeling so pointless and pushed to the side.

i want you to pick me up from the side and pull me back in. to one of your hugs that smell like your fierce and your camel reds and that cute little grey sweater you wear. but your mom dryed it and it shrunk and you got so upset but wore it anyways because i told you it still looked okay. and it did. but she washed it and it didn't smell like you anymore so maybe that should've been taken as a sign or something. fuck this

i need to study.